'I would like to be known for who I am': Between Mahesh Bhatt's wife and Alia's mother, Soni Razdan struggles to be herself

Soni Razdan has always been trying, to push herself as an actor, make her in industry and to carve an identity independent of being wife of a famous filmmaker and mor of a superstar.

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 actor me her debut with critically acclaimed "36 Chowringhee Lane" and went on to feature in films like "Mandi" and "Saaransh" in later years.

In 1986, she got married to Mahesh Bhatt, and even though she continued to work, Razdan still struggles to be kwn more than just someone's wife or mor.

"I have always been kwn as Mahesh Bhatt's wife, and I would tell people 'Hello! I'm here!' This has always been a struggle. I would like to be kwn for who I am. I'm very happy to be kwn as Mahesh Bhatt's wife or Alia's mor. But I am also a person, who in her own right, has gone through quite a lot of odds," she says.

In an interview to PTI, 62-year-old actor shares that every time she's on sets and working, she experiences "euphoria." 

"But it's t like I'm setting out to endeavour to be anything. I'm just being me. This is who I am and I don't think why I shouldn't be what I am." 

Razdan, whose last big release was "Raazi", said after success of film, in which she played mor to her real-life daughter Alia, she was hopeful of getting more roles.

"But it hasn't, t at all. It really hasn't. I'm still waiting for it," she says.

Razdan can't pin-point why industry isn't offering her varied roles.

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"People should see my work and think beyond what I am doing on a daily basis, on Twitter, Instagram or perception y have of me in ir hes.

"People are lazy when y cast. It's natural to think of most obvious fit to your character. I think y should start looking at me differently. I've been able to put myself in different roles completely opposite to what I'm in real life." 

She found one such filmmaker in director Sanjoy Nag who cast her as le in "Yours Truly", a film about love and loneliness.

film, streaming on ZEE5, puts Razdan in spotlight as a woman who, at brink of her retirement, realises what she will miss most in her daily commute to work: voice of railway station anuncer, her invisible but constant companion.

"It is unreal. It's t what you expect at this . I feel blessed that I was able to do this." 

"Yours Truly", based on Annie Zaidi's short story " One That Was Anunced", nips ist stereo around idea of love.

" entertainment industry is always targeted at young people. Understandably so as y are key consumers. young are ones who are falling in love, starting out in life, older people aren't. body thinks 'w I'm going to write a film about an older person," she says.

But  actor isn't pessimistic. current trend in Bollywood of willing to experiment with newer and braver ideas has ignited hope.

"What is happening is that people are thinking of stories which are about characters, as opposed to typical boy-meets-girl template. This trend has happened because audience wants a change. y are interested in watching story of a rapper from a gully. Orwise, film industry is toriously lazy in telling different stories." 

With "Raazi", " Fars In Kashmir" and w "Yours Truly", Razdan is happy with what she has been able to do. But desire to be in front of camera has only become stronger.

"re is always a desire to be significant in some way, to do something which can consume you. As an actor, all you want is to be offered a film so you can go out and shoot. It's same for me; to get that role which hits you. I want to work, I just don't want to stay at home."