'It was the most painful thing...': Deepika Padukone recounts depression diagnosis, reflects on fame

Deepika Padukone is currently gearing up for the release of arguably one of the biggest releases of the year, Siddharth Anand's Fighter. The actress will be sharing screen space with Hrithik Roshan and Anil Kapoor in this aerial action extravaganza. Ahead of the film's release, scheduled for January 25, the actress opened up about her decades-long reflections on fame, tied in with a haunting revisit to the time she was diagnosed with depression.

Deepika Padukone reflects on her struggle with depression

In an interview with Vogue Singapore, Deepika Padukone recounted her 2014 depression diagnosis, recalling it has a truly "painful" journey of healing. Appreciating the learning curve however, the actress also reflected how working on herself to battle the diagnosis is something that made her a "better person". 

She said, "It was the most painful thing I have gone through not just for me, but also for my caregivers. Every day, it takes work to make sure that I don’t have a relapse and slip into it again. But maybe because I have healed, I am now able to say that I’m grateful for the experience because it made me a better person. I learnt a lot from it and it gave me the ability to impact the lives of millions of other people. It allowed me to find my true calling."

Deepika Padukone shares her musings on fame

Breaching the topic of being intentional, Deepika shared how she had always been overtly conscious about the choices she was making - the kind of power this intentionality holds however, is something she has only realised in the later years. She further reiterated how "fame in isolation" is not something that means anything to her - her focus instead is on using the power that comes with it, responsibly. 

She said, "Everything that I do has to be meaningful. I have never been excited by fame, money or power. What excites me is intangible energy that allows you to do so much more...I’m not fascinated by fame in isolation. With fame, you can do so much. Our choices have power. You send out subtle messages through the choices that you make, consciously or subconsciously. My choices of movies that I do and roles that I play have always been a way for me to speak to my community."