VIRAL: Hippo statue stolen, Police flummoxed, Internet not helping

In a bizarre robbery, a massive cast bronze hippopotamus has been stolen from a garden in the UK.

The hippo's statue was located at what has been described as a garden ornament business in Tunbridge Wells near Kent. Pictures of the exhibit show a fairly accurate model of a Hippopotamus that nonetheless weighs only about half as much as an adult male hippo would. Regardless, at three-quarters of a tonne, the statue would hardly have made for a quick smash and grab.

The two-metre-long statue is believed to have been lifted on the intervening night of January 9 and the case is being investigated by the Kent Police. A local police rep said the following about the matter:

"The hippo is extremely heavy and in the past it has taken five people to lift it. It is clear those responsible would have needed a large vehicle such as a flatbed truck and may have also needed to lift it by mechanical means. It is a hugely distinctive object and it is unlikely the offenders will find it that easy to sell on as scrap or to a collector. Because of its sheer size we are hoping people have seen it being transported and also asking members of the public to keep their eyes open and report anything suspicious."

While it is no doubt a case that needs to be solved, netizens have made the following conclusions::

The above tweet is in reference to a popular Christmas song, "I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas", and so is the next one:

Someone else says it's definitely magic:

Someone else says checking the Zoo would be a profitable line of inquiry:

And, of course, there's the obvious explanation:

Finally, there's no sympathy for those who allowed it to be stolen: